assignment_3
Interpersonal conflicts happen everywhere but being so obsessed
by it would result in certain detrimental outcomes, however, if managed
properly, could result in a beneficial result. Now I am going to tell you a
recount on what someone I know very dearly felt in a semester of his university
life. Let us call him Jake to avoid any misconceptions. It was at the last leg
of the semester when project submission was closing in, his group went for a
consultation with their Professor on how they should proceed and any fine-tuning
to be done. It was here when the conflict erupted, his group leader Amos was
unsure on certain aspects in which Jake was in-charge of and did not bother to
ask. Instead of inquiring why and how things were done, Amos presumed most of
it and Jake was unaware of such presumptions. During the consultation, Amos
unknowingly gave many false information to the teacher which angered Jake
multiple times. This compounded with the realisation that Amos has been doing
this behind everyone’s back while having private consultations with their professor,
this forced Jake to resent Amos more. Being unable to bear such escalated
emotions, Jake lashed out at Amos in front of their professor, this ultimately
affected the groups progress and worsen their relationship at that point in
time.
Now from what I could analyse from that recount was that
both sides were wrong and resorted to their human instincts of fight or flight.
This could be evident from the start where Amos did not want to ask on parts
where he was unsure of to assert his dominance as the leader, this places him at
the absolute limit of competing in the Kilmann model. Jake was also showing
similar attitude although he wasn’t the leader but was thrown into a fit of
rage. Eventually both resorted to avoiding which relationship was strained. Now
the recount hasn’t ended, for even competitiveness has also it benefits, recall
how I said affected the groups progress earlier and not hinder nor dampen? It
is because through such competitiveness which led the group completed the
project with proficiency. However, I will not say it is healthy, but it got the
job done. What I would suggest was to have a proper discussion on how things
are going and not let pride get in the way of your decisions, the 6 seconds
strategy to improve EQ would really help where both should have managed
feelings and interdependence to know that they are just but one person no
matter how big their ego may get.
Now you must be asking, how could this be relevant to me (the_reader)?
Now let me ask you a question, how could you have done better? Leave your answers
in the comment section below and hope to see you on week 14. Cheers.
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Hey Josiah, it seems to me that although Jake was quick to anger, his anger was justified. Any normal person would have felt the same way too. Personally, If I was Amos, I would try to clarify my doubts before running my mouth off, especially in front of the lecturer. Even if I do not agree with certain things that Jake might have done, it would have been better to talk things out nicely with Jake rather than shooting my own group in the foot. Overall, I maybe Jake and Amos should try talking things out,so as to better the already strained relationship.
ReplyDeleteHi Josiah,
ReplyDeleteGreat story about interpersonal conflict which also explained how it resulted in one of the uncooperative mode in the Kilmann model. In my opinion, such conflict is often due to a clash of different personalities and poor communication skills. I agreed on the your method of solving the conflict - proper discussion, improvement of one's EQ. Another suggestion I will made is for Jake and Amos to learn how to be a good listener as sometime in life, we all should take a step back and just actively listen to one another. Through the process of active listening, you may learn something new and learn to respect each other which could prevent a conflict from happening. Although, it is sometimes hard to prevent a conflict but after the conflict has happened both of them should respect their differences and learn to compromise to each other. All in all, we must remember that sometimes in life we just need to let it go, instead of worrying about who is "right" or "wrong", we should learn to communicate and accommodate to one another.
Regards,
Yee Tong
https://yeetongcom150.blogspot.com/
Hi Josiah,
ReplyDeleteThank you for sharing your story with us, i can totally related with it. I really feel bad for the whole group. I do agree with you on the part about how most human will resort to fight or flight. I would recommend the group to allocate a time for the whole group to sit down and have a short debrief or discussion to clear things out before things go out of hand. Sometimes it could just be another misunderstanding. Ultimately, we should always try to solve issue through communication and not avoid it.